My mind is not my friend
Yet I want it to be
the thoughts, they dig deep
right into my identity.
It’s like I cannot control them
They target the same hurt wound
Hit and never miss.
I cry inside because I feel so drained
I am so tired of myself and
I am so tired of this.
I wish that we could get along
And engage in only happy, joyful and cheerful moments
I smile at the crazy and wild things I have wanted to do in my life
At this moment, spites of curiosity and courage creep in like little rodents.
It seems before this, I had more of myself together.
My life was simple. I Never thought too much into it
I went along with whatever came
I did whatever the voice in my head seen fit.
But now, now in this very moment, I want the voice, the memories, the replays, everything.
Everything to just stop.
I need to understand what is only of my imagination
Versus what’s in reality.
When the mind is playing against you,
It can be hard to figure this very thing out
In my dreams, it’s real. In my reality, its real.
It’s all real to me.
What if I take everything apart and dissect it?
Hold it through a lens
Would this clarify what my mind says
than what my eyes see?